Ever get the feeling that your meant for more? Daily I feel like I'm not living up to my potential or being responsible enough for my family. Its like I'mholding my self back from...something. I haven't figured out what yet.
Maybe its me, maybe I am holding myself back, I mean, I have all these ideas that I want to get out, starting my own business, building things, being a normal adult but...is that who I really am?
Meh, metaphysical bull crap (For lack of a better word).
Do you tend to over think yourself sometimes?? I think thats where I'm sitting right now, over thinking myself and giving myself too much credit. Im smart, I have alot of potential that I really need to focus on, but where is there time? Father, Husband, employee...
I tend to put my kids first, because they really are the most important thing in my life but am I hurting them because of my own limitations? Am I failing them because I don't like to be outside during the summer? Every day, when I get home, I have both of them and we usually stay inside, because its really hot outside, not because I don't want to go anywhere (Though that is part of it) As it is, I drive 45 minutes to work, then 45 min's back thats nearly 2 hours of driving every day, just to go to and from work, would you want to hop back in the car for a jaunt to somewhere? After all, we live 20 minutes from the nearest major grocery store...10 minutes from town...were country folk.
I digress...really this isn't what I wanted to discuss, but...its really pressing on me, Im beginning to feel like I don't try hard enough, and even if I did, it would be futile.
Ah well, back to work, maybe I'm just being a pessimist.
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Listening to: Stabbing Westward - The Thing I Hate
via FoxyTunes
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